This past weekend was trying. I have never needed booze after a work shift as much as I did this weekend. I just can't deal with people in general anymore, they make me so angry and I can't figure out if it's because I feel like I'm stuck in this job or what. But I do know that this job is making me an angry person and I don't think I like that. I love the idea of leaving your money job and just auditioning and forcing yourself to find acting work. I wonder how that would go for me. I have a feeling that if I go out and do summer stock I'll not want to go back to working a money job again. What would I do if I absolutely had to make money acting. The fact is I just don't have the savings to do something like that. I have no way of paying rent if I do that. But that idea is just so interesting to me. Would I pass or fail? Will I not be able to succeed because I will never push myself to that extreme and will alway operate in this comfort zone?

At least I've been going to one audition a week for the past three weeks, that's more than I can say for September. I really need to start preparing for the summer stock season by going to dance classes and getting better at tapping and also just learning choreography. Definitely need an awesome 16 bar cut nailed down too. I have such a hard time finding 16 bar cuts. Someone show me the light, please. Ok, must clean room before I go to bed tonight so I can operate tomorrow.